This amused me, improved my mood, and distracted me from worries about the day’s various and sundry problems. 

My Cat Teenie

This lightened my spirit tremendously. My heart had wings. Desire for those wings is one reason I meditate. Also, instead of having to start a meditation by struggling to become centered, the cosmos had sent kitty to make me relaxed and in the moment. I was easily made ready to do a more serious meditation. I lay down on the floor, for a beautiful peaceful meditation during which guidance I needed about how to approach the rest of the day came. 

May 2: There are hundreds if not thousands of ants and their eggs in my mailbox! (Rural living!) I was so happy yesterday when we staved off the beginning of an ant infestation in my kitchen, before it had a chance to cause trouble. But now, all the way across the street from me (I lived rurally so my mailbox is across the street), there are way more ants than the few that were in the house. 

Looking into the mailbox, I kept saying, “Little gods, they’re little gods, little gods come to visit me.” (I’m a pantheist.) And chanting “Little visits from God,” and “God’s Little helpers” (I also serve the Goddess, whom I often call God, as well as have a pantheon of Gods who run my life. Obviously, I live in contradictions. I do it happily) as I doused the critters in the mailbox with vinegar that was scented with peppermint essential oil.

Merry Prankster, Kathleen Marshal, with her permission

At the time of writing this, I’ve only just finished cleanup on the mailbox. I don’t know yet what message the little gods were trying to give me. But my point here is: I have to share the two events I’ve recounted because they’re typical of my whole day—it’s like I live in a mystical three ring circus. I think I’m its holy clown but my cat is the better trickster. And she is not alone, because my day by day is filled with the wondrous absurdity of life. I constantly experience outrageous synchronicities, a continuous kaleidoscope that is fun and funny and reveals a beautiful yet absurd cosmic pattern. This pattern, or call it a flow, fills me with love and joy from the Divine and offers its guidance. If I abide by the guidance, it is so abundant as to smooth my every step. Of course, I’m typically human so I am far from perfect in following the wonderful input. But bit by bit, I grow.

I’d love it if you posted below, and shared a time when the Divine used humor to give you guidance or power or just just plain ol joy!

I can’t wait to see what will happen next.

——–
I started a blog on my other site. Two separate blogs, two separate RSS feeds.  The RRS feed for the new blog is in the right hand sidebar (on a phone or Ipad it might be at the bottom) here: http://www.stardrenched.com I hope you join me there, I have wild plans.

Middle Management for Chaos Gods, Self Portrait

Drum Roll!  I started an additional blog! My longtime Wiccan site has been been revitalized, renewed, and relaunched! I hope you check it out, we worked really hard on it, and had a lot of fun. The big flashy opening – tada! – is at http://stardrenched.com/2012/05/05/ta-da/ 

The blog on that site has its own separate RSS feed.  We are still doing some tech polish so you cannot get to the RSS feed on every blog. But the RRS feed is here in the right hand sidebar (on a phone or Ipad it might be at the bottom) : http://www.stardrenched.com  I hope you join me there, I have wild plans.

I painted this digitally. The background is a photo of a fan-shaped paper-cutting I made in the 90s.

This blog is not just relevant to artists. It is more about living fully. That is the most important art. One could extrapolate from this blog, applying my creative process to any part of life. See the closing paragraph; I hope you will comment about how your own way of nurturing an ecstatic state.

 When I started making digital art, I made a commitment. If I painted a little rose, paisley, or other ornamentation for a picture, I would not save the ornament. I would not stockpile these details. I wanted each new painting to be a work unto itself.

An exception is when I feel I have not made the best use of an ornament. Then maybe maybe MAYBE I’ll try to find a way to use it again. But most likely I will delete it, no matter the temptation.

This makes things ways more work. Way way more. It is worth it. I no more want to be caught up in repetitious use of ornaments than in rigid thought, I want the gorgeously unrepeatable moment in my life, over and over and over and over. That’s what I want to repeat (as well as some words in this blog, apparently, LOL). I am no master painter; at the time of this writing, I am just shy two years old, a fledging at painting and drawing; but I am an old hand at living in the moment. And, though creating visual art is not my main thing—in fact, it is far from it—I want maximum joy, integrity, and exploration of my inner and outer world in everything I do.

Direct revelation and other joys of mysticism happen in the now.

Detail of ornamentation in above painting

There are other exceptions, all aimed at living fully. I might use an ornament again if I think I can learn something by doing so. E.g., find different facets of it. I’m not setting restrictive rules here to stifle myself, I’m trying to do the exact opposite, nurture an ecstatic state.

It is about knowing what will help me grow and be happy. On occasion, I have included one of my paintings—I’m not referring to ornaments now, but to a whole painting—in a composite of my different works. This is an exploration for me; I perhaps find new experiences in the pieces—new moments—as I take them into new contexts. I find that exciting. It illuminates my inner world so I see it better. It builds my personal mythology by letting it expand into various contexts.

A painting is usually part of my mythic self. When I put some of these myths together, I create (and discover) the larger, more complete myth.

An actual painting might represent a personal truth, maybe a longstanding one or perhaps one I discover through the painting process. I like to gather my truths together, and see where that leads me.

Another way repetition helped me: I wrote and illustrated a Faerie tale (which I hope to post soon on my other site). It was fun to use the same ornamentations throughout to build a fantasy world setting for the story. And it added a sense of whimsy.

Someone else might find saving ornaments a creative exploration. I support that. We each have our own way to find joy and completeness. But for me, no stockpiling! No creating file after file until digital clutter is massive. I want space in my life for life.

This blog is less about digital art than it is about the ecstatic path. I would love it if, below, you post any way you make room for or otherwise create fullness of being.

Financial hardship or other big problems can seem impossible to solve—no matter how hard you try. They also might make you lose (or have less) hope and enthusiasm.

On May 9, I will start a month-long practice. I can do it for you, a direct spiritual transmission that works inside and out, helping you
 * Overcome hard times, so your needs are met better.
* Regain, strengthen, or find for the first time hope and enthusiasm, no matter your circumstances.

Traditional Spiritual Practitioner, digital fantasy art, Francesca De Grandis

Some people want everyone cowed, so they try to convince us that hope and enthusiasm are conditional. But we can have them no matter what. This transmission works! No experience needed, but even advanced practitioners are deeply impacted.

The powers that be also want you to think you have to improve your life and self all on your own. My transmissions are part of a tradition—old-fashioned grass-roots practitioners supporting community through spiritual work that nurtures spirit while also meeting down-to-earth needs.

“Francesca, I want to thank you again for the spiritual transmissions. I have been feeling great!…The days seem more meaningful, my time more useful, my attitude more positive. Great opportunities have come my way and sales are coming in (even with the shop closed). This last week I had website sales almost everyday, several sales at the shop where I consign items, and even some sales at home. I hope you know how much I appreciate your positive spiritual attention/energy directed toward my prosperity/well-being. You are a treasure! Peace and Love, Sandy Austin”

Nuts and bolts of receiving transmissions for a month:
* Sliding scale cost: $20-$200.
* To register: go to www.paypal.com * Log into your account * Click the Send Money tab. * Use outlawbunny@outlawbunny.com as the Recipients Email. * Fill in the amount of $20-$200, paying what you can honestly afford. * Put the following in the notes section: the words “Overcoming Hard Times”; your name; your phone #.
* If you can’t afford payment, phone me by May 6. I only can give scholarships to someone I speak with. 814-337-2490
* If you need more info, do not email me; my disabilities do not allow enough time at the computer. Call 814-337-2490.
* Upon receipt of payment, I’ll send you email confirmation of registration. No refunds. 

I have started taking two days a week off from doing transmissions. Not only do I need the break, it also strengthens the transmissions.

A shamanic treatment is not a substitute for proper medical care by a trained physician, psychiatric counseling, or other therapeutic treatments. Participants are personally responsible for the consequences of their voluntary participation. This spiritual treatment is extraordinarily effective, but may not work for some individuals.

I hope you will grant me the privilege of serving you. To register, click here.

Detail of altarcloth – stylized seven-pointed star. Francesca De Grandis

Hand-Painted Silk Art Altar Cloth for Warrior Poet

PG, you said on my Facebook page link you like to see the process. Hence this post. Click pics to see em full size.

Folks, skip process to get to Product and Purchase Info.

First I dyed white silk, with low-immersion dyeing, which leaves a mottled effect (interesting texture). I dye a very small number of pieces at a time, usually 3-4. This was a huge batch for me—seven altar cloths. To the right is a pic of all seven hanging on my shower curtain rod to dry.

Next day I start trance-painting. I love doing this. See pic of altar cloth ready to paint.

Basic lines done. They are my first inkling that this piece will be for a fey warrior poet.

Trance deepened, detailing started.

Trance deepened, detailing started.

The basic design and its intial ornamentation were painted in red, green, and purple. Then I applied purple and red metallics, which are subtle because I mostly applied red metallic to the red that I’d already laid down, and they were a close color match. Ditto purple metallic. But the point was not whether they screamed metallic; they add dimensionality to the paint they were applied over.

Last step of painting was adding more ornamentation to the basic design. I used a soft green metallic that has a subtle rich glimmer. I was not sure I liked the altarcloths until I added this final touch, but it made all the difference. The metallics are by Jacquard, as is most of what I used for this altar cloth.

Detail, Hand Painted Silk Altarcloth, Francesca De Grandis

Hand-Painted Art Silk, Francesca De Grandis

Spent better part of the day painting one altar cloth. Worth it, am way happy with the final result! See more pics of it below. Scroll past them for more info.

Hand-Painted Art Silk, Francesca De Grandis

Next are parts of the process artist don’t show pictures of, LOL. Heh, maybe these steps aren’t graaahhhhnd enough to seem arteeeestic.

I wash the hoops so they’re all clean for the next piece I paint. Here is a pic of washed hoops hanging to dry. My home is filled with dyed silk hanging on a shower curtain rod, hoops drying on door knobs,…

Next day, painting is ready to set. I got very excited when I learned vinegar and baking soda would remove the gunky build-up on my iron. It took time but then I could use the iron to set the painting!

And here are brushes soaking til I have time to clean them for next piece.

Think I’m going overboard? I refrained from posting a pic of dirty rags after cleanup! You crafters know there are many parts of creative process that folks don’t usually show. I liked posting a few; it feels nice to have camaraderie re the not-so-high-and-falutin work that takes a zillion times more hours than the actual art does.

Big thanks to everyone who encouraged me during this project!!!

Product and Purchase Info: Painted freehand, initialed and dated by artist. This altar cloth for a warrior poet will lend beauty, grace, and Faerie magic to any spell. Hand wash. $99, free S & H. 

This altarcloth is still available. I’ll post immediate notice here when it’s sold. 

To purchase: go to http://www.paypal.com * Log into your account * Click Send Money tab. * Use outlawbunny@outlawbunny.com as the Recipients Email. * Fill in the amount of $99. * Put the following in the notes section: the words “Poet Warrior altarcloth”; your name; the address you want me to ship to; your phone #. I only ship to the U.S. La!

This piece is not in everyone’s budget (it would not be in mine. Which is why, for those who have never been to my Etsy shop, I have a wide price range, and it’s all good stuff!).

Hugs to whoever reads this, FDG

Putting one last blessing on the piece

I was commissioned to paint a deer.

Even so, I was not sure whether it was a good painting.  FB buds, thank you again, your likes cleared my worries! I’m so new a painter I can’t judge my work.  My client likes it too, yay! (I was afraid it might be too girly for him.)

I was inspired to try to paint my second deer. (Pic of it is above.) Had an design in mind. I felt there was another deer spirit who wanted his portrait painted. Got on a roll, finished it today! That is why these aren’t fancy pics. Here is a big pic of it, scroll past it to read more.

I did the painting on a men’s XL cotton T-shirt. The blue lines will wash out, they are just my rough sketches of what I wanted.

Talk about girly, I outlined parts of the deer in green, it kinda looks like eyeshadow on his eyes. Yaya!

I wonder if deer spirit will call me to paint more deers. If so, it will be different. I can’t copy well, not even copy my own work! I will say, the two deer are more similar than most of my other paintings. 

Let’s play grown-ups:  Make me an offer, someone, this shirt is for sale. Whatever you offer, I will reduce that price by $5, because you will have to wash the shirt yourself. My washer is acting up, stained the last two painted shirts I put in it, both of which I was going to sell,  but now can’t, argh!

Now I have to patient, I can’t set the dye on this shirt til tomorrow. 

OK, anyone have an offer I feel good about?

PG on FB, you got dibs if you like the shirt (and act quickly enough, heh). 

Everyone else, post an offer below, XL may be too big for PG. 

Hugs, having fun, FDG

Sigils, Francesca De Grandis

With so many spiritual healers nowadays, finding one suited to you can discourage you from using any. But somewhere inside, you know the right choice. 

As you read the next paragraph, I know you’ll feel whether I am useful to you. 

I’ve no ambition to be queen of spiritual healers. I just have a simple straight­-forward gift I feel compelled to use. I’m very ill. (The closest to a diagnosis is Multiple Sclerosis.) This may make it seem I’m not a “good” healer. The important measure is not whether I live in a castle (so to speak), but what I have done with the “home” I’ve been given. The traditional term for me is “wounded healer:” I should’ve died many times. Including 2006, when the current illness (the MS or whatever) almost had me down for the count. But I make the spiritual breakthroughs needed to keep on. It is not my doing. I’m in grateful awe of Divinity’s ability to make me successful despite my limits: I survive and continue to have joy, vitality of spirit, and ability to devote my day to what I love—using my shamanism to serve others. I experience daily miracle: more and more beauty and health around me and inside me.  

Francesca De Grandis, Oct 2011

The nuts and bolts:
* Cost slides $125 to $200.
* You don’t have to show up at an event, or otherwise add another burden to your schedule.
* Just go to www.paypal.com  * Log into your account. * Click Send Money tab. * Use outlawbunny@outlawbunny.com as the Recipients Email. * Fill in the amount of $125-$200; pay what you can honestly afford. * Put the following in the notes section: the words “shamanic treatment for my body and spirit”; your name; your phone #.
* Upon receipt of payment, I confirm your payment by email, and do your healing within a week. If an emergency requires immediate help, phone me before payment to be sure I’m available. 814-337-2490.
 * No refunds.
* If you can’t afford my fees, phone me. 814-337-2490
* When I finish the ceremony, I inform you by email.
* For all faiths or lack thereof. 

Sigil to Bless Rite for Healing Body and Spirit, Francesca De Grandis. I put sigils on this page to add power to my healing ceremonies.

Feel welcome to call me after the ceremony, if you wish. 814-337-2490. For example, maybe you experience a new level of spiritual power from the healing ceremony, which leaves you with a hunger for even more. I’m happy to offer suggestions.  But no call required to receive the benefits of the healing.  Simply register for your treatment. 

If you want to chat just to “feel my vibe” before choosing a healing from me, or need more info to know whether my work’s right for you, call me: 814-337-2490. I do not discuss healings by email.

Success: Seven months pregnant, Jasmine became ill. Constant vomiting dehydrated her. That induced contractions, two months early. She went to the hospital, at the doctor’s request. Jasmine’s mother called me for a healing. The contractions stopped almost immediately after I did the work. Jasmine carried full term. She and the baby are fine. 

Feedback: “I had a sinus infection for six months. Two rounds of antibiotics didn’t fix it. After Francesca gave me a healing session, the infection finally left, and my sinus area felt better than it had in years! One sinus had been chronically messed up at least ten years.” —Ellen Isaacs / “Francesca literally gave me my voice back! 35 years ago, I lost my vocal range due to asthma. After one healing, most of that range came back. I cannot express how great it feels to sing again without embarrassment!” —Barbara, N.Y. / “Francesca emanates healing energy. She can’t even help it, it’s her. There’s an awesomely deep love within her that heals people.” —William Michaels / “A big thank you for the healing…I spent 3 hours experiencing all of the flu symptoms that I would have had for the next 10 days; then I was fine…IOU a week of my life.” —JF / “She transmits real healing…I had a feeling that I should earn healing by working hard for it. But then I realized that the healing Francesca gives is a gift. And I can show up for it and be grateful for it, or I can not show up…” —Tara Noonan” 

In-depth Feedback: “My lower back had been bothering me since I was 13 (I’m now 41); I’ve tried everything, but one healing from Francesca fixed it. I strained my right SI joint at age 13 during rapid growth at puberty. As a result, that area of my back was unstable and caused me bouts of pain, sciatica, and occasional immobility. For nearly 30 years I had worked on it with chiropractic, acupuncture, massage, Pilates, physical therapy, ice and heat therapy, meditation, etc. One healing session with Francesca significantly shifted and healed that injury. During the session, I was focused on and hoping to address a completely different issue: exhaustion. In addition to feeling a sweet energy boost for my exhaustion, I unexpectedly felt a warmth and gentle tingling in my SI area and lower back. I thought, “Oh! That’s going to my old injury!” Over the next few days, I noticed there was no pain in the old area. Over the next weeks, and now for over six months, I have been enjoying a feeling of growing strength, alignment, and power in that area of my back, my hip, and all down my right leg. It feels like a permanent change.”—Vanna Z. Red 

My work is effective, but does not work for everyone. A shamanic treatment is not a substitute for medical care by a trained physician, psychiatric counseling, or other therapeutic treatments. Participants are personally responsible for the consequences of their voluntary participation. 

Miracles happen! Click here.

Here, these cheerful blossoms will not be around in any quantity for very long. I gobble them up, consume them fast as I can. I figure their brief but prolific stay means Nature wants me to eat lots of them, right now, that I need that. The way they make my body feel concurs. La! Oh, la!

Just seeing them makes my eyes feel better, healthier, my eyes need to see them to be healthy.

I sit on the ground amidst them, this abundance of solar healing, eating. I make tea. I make syrup (thank you, Susun Weed).

I feel sunshine filling me, filling me, filling me more and more as I consume the yellow heads who sacrifice their little lives. Except you should leave the big ones, it may be Susun Weed who calls them grandmothers, and says not to eat them. Their seeds will grow more frothy flowers next year. But I think us elderly witches are allowed to eat the old grandma plants.

Nature is smart, Nature is generous. It makes me sad that many people poison and dig out these happy flowers to eradicate their huge quantity, then have to go to the doctor, ill because they have neither enough sunshine in them or the other gifts nature so wants to imbue them with.

Humans are part of the earth, so we too have a permaculture. We can know it authoritatively if we watch our bodies and spirits as patiently and analytically as a farmer watches sky and earth. Food is one of the main ways we take in nature’s healing gifts. Study your body’s needs and interactions with good and pseudo-food. Trust the singing in your cells that wholesome food gives you.

Chaos Circus, Francesca De Grandis. Need feedback: could you tell the eye was a cat’s before I told you? I painted my cat and didn’t like how I did her eyes. So the eyeball was a study I assigned myself. I’m happy to find a use for it, after all the work it took. I mean, LOL, at first I thought. “What I could ever do with a cat's eye?” But I also made a kinda tarot card out of it (though whether I ever actually produce a deck…)

Disclaimer: I have no scientific basis for the above piece. It is not meant to prescribe, cure, blah blah blah.
———

Yes, I feel sunshine inside my body and spirit. Crazy like me? Come one, come all! Join the chaos circus.

Waiting for guests to arrive for a jam.  Thinking. Forgetting that I’m a crip is usually a good thing, as long as I don’t hurt myself. But sometimes, it causes me disappointments. 

I tweeted today, “Now set the dye on two  floral items I painted. Green god! Then, long bath, next monthly old timey kitchen jam! Then teach. Great day!”

But there was no leisurely nurturing bath. Ok, there are bigger problems in the world. But it is really difficult being a shut in. It is lonely. And nurturing myself taxes my inventiveness, there are only so many things you can do at home as a cripple, even less if you’re low income. 

Mind you, I do not want to wallow in my problems. But I do not want to be in denial about them, either.

The bath: I cannot manage a shower, and a bath is difficult, sometimes painful. My doctor prescribed a daily caretaker to help me do things like bathe. Typical American health-care bureaucrats turned me down. 

So bathing is quite an operation. (Don’t judge crips for being grubby.) Even a “quick” wash takes a long time. 

Nevertheless, sometimes I can manage a pleasant bath, with time to soak. 

Today, I forgot I had disabilities, forgot I’d already done too many things to also relax in the tub. In other words, after what I had accomplished, being in the tub quickly got painful. 

Relaxing in a tub is usually too strenuous for me!

At least I am a clean crip. 

I need to complain, vent a second more. Because it is not just the bath. It is a series of events all day. Many of the most basic functions can only be executed by carefully planned time-consuming measures. One simple task complicated, then another, then another, snowballing into what constitutes a crip’s life.  

What positive attitude can I glean from this? I can affirm the idea that I am lucky to be stubborn enough to do all this. 

And I can recognize that I am not the only one with this sort of struggle. And it is not just people with disabilities. Many folks live with invisibly complex challenges and the disappointments thereof.  I am not the Lone Ranger, I don’t have to feel poor me and nobody knows the troubles I’ve seen. 

The other thing I can glean? My isolation has impelled me to draw and paint, new skills which give me great joy. 

One more goodness for me to affirm: The jam was great! A kitchen full of love and joy. We even had someone playing spoons and someone else playing jaw harp. And many other parts of my day have been good. It is vital I enjoy those, vital to forget – or at let not dwell on – being a crip. I will not let myself be defined by my disabilities, least of all in my own mind! Yes, as my tweet said, it is a great day. 

Now, to go rest before I teach that class! I do enjoy my naps. Hmm, maybe I will lie down outside, I bet my cat would join me. 

 Be a Leaf Among All the Leaves that Have Ever Fallen from Trees
April, 2012 

My Gods, help us all shine—continue to shine, start to shine, know we shine, shine ever brighter, as the case may be.  

Naysayers are a plague of flies,
trying to blot out stars and sun.
A healing light shines,
but a fly says, “She is a fake. She has no light.” Another fly adds,
“She has no power.”
Other flies mimic and chant, “Fake! No power! No light!”  

Lies draw other flies, because fly nature is fed by offal. Slander spreads insect by insect, over the globe, because this horde of small, fearful, and jealous beings have yet to find their own power—their own enormous size and light.  

My Gods, help us all shine—continue to shine, start to shine, know we shine, shine ever brighter, as the case may be.  

Choose: Be part of the naysaying horde who hide their fear, even from themselves, hide it with disgust for those who try to make a difference. Rant against healers, be small, disguise this cowardice as a battle for truth and honor. Choose: Be covered in flies and lies so that your own light does not shine.  

Or look past them. Do you see a light, a healer?
Decide for yourself.
Only you can know whether you see a star shining.  

Be a light, a star with all the other stars in the sky, shining healing magic for everyone, you are that big already, innately, unless you lose your size to lies. Don’t lose your size by spreading lies.  

Be a light, a star from the sky walking among us as a healer, we are all stars walking. When flies say of you, “No light! No light!,” don’t let it dim you. Whatever the lies, some of us can see you anyway!  

Be a leaf, among all the leaves that have ever fallen from trees—all the leaves that
have ever blanketed the earth
with rich colors.
Turn into fragrant dark compost.
It is a leaf’s nature to fall, then crumble, it is
easy to do these things—to nurture life just
be yourself, that heals the world.  

May we all continue to shine. My Gods, help us—continue to shine, start to shine, know we shine, shine ever brighter.  

My Gods, help me find the humility to fall and
crumble to feed the lights of all.
Help me remember that, when I dissolve
against the earth, my soul goes down to be
reborn into a new self, a brighter light than ever—I  become a new leaf.
Help me have the self-esteem to recognize
the power of the leaf I am.

********

For more bardic poetry, check out The Ecstatic Goddess.